How many times have you heard people say: “Don’t be jealous, it is horrible to be jealous”. Someone asks : “Are you jealous?” and you are quick to respond “Me, no are you kidding me, of course not”.
Every feeling you feel is human and hence, is normal. Jealousy is a feeling, not a pleasant feeling however, one that should be given permission to exit, like all other feelings.
Let’s be honest, everyone at a certain phase in his or her life has felt jealous. Living in all human capacity means allowing yourself to feel jealous and not to disown this painful part that lives in you. On the contrary, admitting to it so you can treat it and heal.
Be mindful when jealousy appears. Stay with the feeling for a while, without any dramas. Give this feeling that brings you so much suffering, room to breathe.
Jealousy is never about the other person, it is always about what the person triggers in you. What wound from childhood is being opened, what feelings of lacking are evoked, what insecurities are revealed, how inferior you feel. The painful feeling of “not good enough” is coming up again and again when you encounter this person.
Jealousy is a feeling of “I am less, I don't measure up”. Jealousy by itself is not destructive, it is a human feeling. It is what we do with this feeling that can bear devastating results.
Instead of carrying the shame and suffering of jealousy, why not treat it with love and compassion? It is important to go to the root of your insecurity when you face X, sending love and compassion to your wounded child that feels hurting and lacking. Telling your inner child how important he or she is to you.
When you give freedom to your jealous feeling and explore its source from childhood, you will eventually heal the pain and the wounds. You may need to recruit all your patience, self love, self forgiveness and your courage.
I have discovered that admitting to my vulnerabilities is not a weakness, on the contrary, it takes lots of courage to face my unpleasant feelings, to own them and to heal.
How much easier it is to deny our jealous emotions and stay with the wounds, feeling like a victim. However, when we don't deal with our painful feelings of jealousy and deny them, we are a walking bomb that can explode at anytime.
All jealousy needs is love, respect and compassion, a shoulder to cry on. It needs a listening ear, a hug. It is begging for your undivided support in transforming the feelings of “lacking and humiliation” to a new awareness of celebrating your unique creation.
Using a Biotensor or Pendulum can help you find and release your limiting beliefs by EFT tapping or Master tapping.
Galia Azori, Toronto, Canada